Necessary Apologies

A Creative Landscape

There is a topic that I understand may be difficult for many. It is for myself as well, so I get it. However, I believe it is one that needs to be explored.

That topic is one of acknowledging the many ways through the years that we may have betrayed our own creative voices. I believe this is common to everyone, not only women. Due to lack of support during our childhoods, or needing to focus on the next paycheck as adults, the creative voice may be stifled. It is amazing to me that this voice is as resilient as it is.

Personally I can think of three or four times that my creative voice was denied by me through my lifetime. The occurrences were probably far more often and sometimes more subtle than the ones of which I am thinking. During those times that I remember that my creative voice believed in me and was ready to grow more fully. However, I switched gears, which effectively denied my own voice. There were other things seemed more immediate in the moment, or paths forward appeared blocked. I don’t remember reflecting upon these situations and their consequences. I simply made other choices.

So what can we do? What can I do?

My thoughts are that our creative voices may like accountability as well as an apology. My other thoughts are that acknowledging that this relationship and the choices we make daily is important. Simply being kind to one’s self can go a long way to repair and strengthen a voice that has been denied. I am thinking of Julia Cameron’s process in The Artist’s Way. Writing Morning Pages, walking and Artist’s Dates are part of her prescription toward healing. However in the meantime, the creative self may pout. That’s okay. It is all part of beginning to listen. Are we willing to listen? Am I willing to listen?

Showing up. Writing on Substack. A few words may become a sentence. Those sentences may become an article. This process seems to be one way of tending a deepening relationship. Pulling out the watercolors and brushes. Walking in nature and noticing. Each of us has individual expressions of a deeper relationship and different tools available to us. But at some point it may involve an apology. At some point it involves accountability. At some point it involves honoring the time and what shows up each day.

Thoughts?

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